A Message Exclusively to the Husbands

The husband seeks from his wife that she should be an ideal wife: affectionate, kind, receptive, attractive, enticing, charming and other than that. However, on the other hand, some husbands dishonor their wives and neglect the obligatory rights that have been placed upon them.

Yes, there are rights belonging to the husband that are binding upon the wife to uphold. But where are the wife's rights that are binding upon the husband? The wife asks, the writers write, and the publishers produce a large variety of books clarifying the husband's rights upon the wife, yet only a few, compared to the vast number of works, address the wife's rights from her husband.

The Eighteen Types of Husbands Addressed

• The one who abandons the prayer
• The one who abandons the home
• The frequent traveler
• The merchant
• The confused
• The caller to Allah
• The finagler
• The one who belittles his wife
• The one who prevents his wife from seeking knowledge
• The one who is rough during relations
• The one who shows up unexpectedly
• The one who feels he is too good for his wife
• The man who has a weak personality
• The man who abandons his responsibilities
• The one who threatens his wife with divorce
• The one who (intentionally) makes things difficult
• The one who allows others to steer his personal affairs
• The man who gives his wife free reign

Why a Message Addressed Specifically to Husbands

Because the imbalance the opening describes is real and common: a great deal of religious material on marriage addresses what is expected of a wife, and considerably less directly confronts husbands with their own obligations in equally specific terms. Naming eighteen distinct types — rather than one generic warning — forces a reader to find himself somewhere on the list rather than assuming the book is about someone else.

Who It Is For

Husbands and men preparing for marriage, and imams counseling couples who want a resource that addresses men's obligations as directly as women's.

Related Reading

• Rights of the Spouses — the rights of the spouses, addressed to both
• A Message Exclusively to the Muslim Woman — a companion message to the Muslim woman
• Keys to a Successful Marital Life — keys to a successful marital life